Andrea Annear, one-half of the first couple with Down syndrome to have got married in the UK, has d.i.e.d aged 45. Andrea and Paul Annear were married in Lytham St Annes, Lancashire, in 2004. They first met in a home for children with learning disabilities when she was just 3 years old – the pair became friends and were later described as “inseparable”. She d.i.e.d of heart failure, due to a long-term heart condition linked to her disability. The couple fought against medical opinion, social workers, and their own carers to have a big traditional wedding in the church they attended every week.
Doctors argued that the couple shouldn’t be married because of the risk of Andrea becoming pregnant if they started a sexual relationship – Andrea’s heart condition meant that a pregnancy could potentially kill her. But as she told the in 2006: Paul asked me to marry him and I told him yes. I cried – some big fat tears went down my face because I was so happy. Paul got down on his knee and said: ‘Will you marry me?’ and I said: ‘Yes.’ I loved him so much I could actually feel it inside my heart. I had seen pictures of ladies getting married, in magazines, and I wanted to look like that, too.
I wanted to have a pretty white dress, and I wanted Paul to have a smart suit and I wanted to be with him always. That is what marriage means – to love somebody and to be with them always. The couple had a “low-key blessing” in 1999 in Andrea’s group home after the authorities persuaded them against marriage. But they still yearned for a traditional wedding and didn’t understand why they were being denied one. Andrea worked in the laundry room at a local hotel while Paul worked as a porter, each earning £20 a week, and they insisted they would pay for their gold rings themselves. They eventually used their savings to buy two rings at a discounted rate of £175. Andrea was so desperate to marry that she had a series of birth control injections to make sure there could be no pregnancy, at the insistence of social workers and doctors.
Sue Sharples, the director of the Ormerod Trust, which provides services to people with learning disabilities, told the Mail: “There were many barriers put in their way but their love for each other was so obvious but the birth control was needed to protect Andrea’s heart.” Paul told the in 2006 that they met with the local vicar to convince him to perform the ceremony. He said: “I told him that I loved Andrea very much. He asked us why we wanted to be married and we told him that we were happy together. I told him that she makes my heart feel full. I feel like singing and dancing when Andrea is around.” After the vicar gave his blessing and left, Andrea said, the couple jumped for joy.
Paul said that when he saw Andrea in her wedding dress he burst into tears. The couple lived together and, aside from a daily visit from a carer to make sure they were OK, lived an ordinary married life. They shared a love of music, dancing, and Doctor Who. Andrea told the Mail in 2006: “We love being Mr and Mrs together. I make Paul a meal in the evening and we sit on the sofa next to each other. We love to watch Coronation Street or Doctor Who. We look at our wedding album every day and the pictures make us smile. If it is sunny, we go for walks and we hold hands. Or Paul plays his music and we dance and tell each other jokes.”
She added: I am just a normal wife and Paul is just my normal husband. That’s all we’ve ever wanted to be. They celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary in September 2014. Mark Menzies, MP for Fylde, said: “I was very sad to hear of the death of Andrea – she was a well-known figure in the town. “They were the first couple with Down’s to marry in this country and were inseparable in their time together. This is a difficult time for Paul and my thoughts are with him.”
